LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT OUR CHURCH

 Explaining the Story, Statements, Structure and Strategy Of New Wine Church 

“THIS IS HOW WE LIVE”

By Pastor Tayo Adeyemi
New Wine Church, London

Sunday 21 August 2011

Foundation Scriptures: Matthew 16:18 & Habbakuk2: 2-3

Last week, we began by looking at our Statement of Faith, which speaks of what we believe; and we agreed that what we believe will determine how we behave. We also agreed that it is important for us to know not only what we believe, but also why we believe. We then went on to look at our lifestyle statements, which are baptism, communion, worship, fellowship, evangelism and ministry.
We unpacked the first three of those seven lifestyle statements – baptism, communion and worship. Baptism by immersion in water, we learned, is an outward symbol of a believer’s faith and a representation of our identification with Jesus Christ in His death, burial and resurrection. We looked at Communion, which comes from the Greek word ‘koinonia’, meaning fellowship, association, community or joint participation and learned that the broken bread represents the body of Jesus, which was broken for us; and that the wine represents the blood of Jesus, which was shed for us. Finally we looked at Worship; and establish that it is our number one priority because we were created to worship God and agreed that at New Wine church, our worship is celebrative, reflective and expressive. Now today, we are going to pick up from there and look at the remaining four lifestyle statements. 

In Acts 2 we see a very succinct description of the lifestyle of the early church. Particularly in Acts 2: 41-42, 46-47 from which we understand that the early church ‘continued steadfastly in the apostles’ doctrine and fellowship in the breaking of bread and prayers’ we see our lifestyle statements, namely baptism, communion, worship, fellowship, discipleship, evangelism and ministry encapsulated perfectly.
So, let’s start with Fellowship which is an integral aspect of church life. In fact, take fellowship out of church and it is no longer church. Notice how this passage says they ‘continued steadfastly’ in fellowship. So, this was not something they did by the way – they were deliberate about it; and they were consistent with it. Last year, when I taught on the power of connection, we understood that the strength of any church is essentially the strength of the connection between its members. In 1 John 1:3-4 we understand that our joy can only be full when we are in fellowship with God and with one another. Incidentally, the Greek word for fellowship is exactly the same Greek word for communion – ‘koinonia’.

As a local church, we are a fellowship. But fellowship is not just what we are; it is also what we do. The point here is that we must be deliberate about connecting with one another. As a member of this church, you owe it to yourself to be aware of all the opportunities for fellowship provided by your church; and to take advantage of them. From joining a team to joining a Cell Group, to attending events for men, women, youth, singles etc, the opportunities are there – you just need to be aware of them.

Somebody once defined fellowship as “two fellows in a ship” - I like that definition. It means we’re on a journey together, we’re headed in the same direction and we have the same destination so we might as well get to know each other, so we can enjoy the journey together. If you’ve been in this church for more than six months, and you don’t know at least twelve people very well, you are not participating in fellowship. In Acts 2:42 we see that the early church members prayed together, studied the word together and devoted themselves to doing so. I ask you: ‘Are you devoting yourself to fellowship?’

Now, for any kind of fellowship to be effective, we must embrace and promote harmony and unity as a matter of priority. There is a slight difference between harmony and unity, although they both work to achieve the same goal. Harmony is the consistent, orderly arrangements of different parts whereas unity is bringing the different parts together to work as one. Now, promoting harmony and unity does not mean we all have to be exactly the same. In fact, harmony by definition means we have to be different. Singers will tell you that for four people to sing in harmony, they all have to sing different parts. Unity is not the same as uniformity. I don’t have to be exactly like you for us to work together as one.  God loves variety and diversity which is why there are 35,000 species of tulips and over 18,000 species of roses. If all roses were red, the world would be a very boring place! God created you to be unique, so it’s okay to be yourself but in trying to be yourself, make sure you’re doing everything to promote harmony and unity.

Romans 14: 19 exhorts us to ‘aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up’ and in Ephesians 4: 3 we are instructed ‘make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.’  Therefore you must constantly ask yourself whether your words and actions are promoting harmony and unity or disharmony and disunity.
Discipleship, just like baptism, is an integral part of the great commission. In Matthew 28: 19-20 Jesus told us ‘Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptising them in the name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you’ We were not commissioned to go and make converts or even to make church members; we were commissioned to make disciples. And if you look closely in that passage, Jesus tells us how to make disciples. How? By ‘teaching them to observe’. So disciples are made through a programme of systematic teaching. You cannot be satisfied with just the fact that you are saved, you need to ask yourself; “Am I a disciple?” If you look through the entire ministry of Jesus He always made a distinction between the multitudes and the disciples. To His disciples, He would say things like; “To you it has been given to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but to them it has not been given”. [Luke 8:10] He would speak to the multitudes in parables, but He would break things down for His disciples. In every church there are multitudes and there are disciples and you have to honestly and seriously ask yourself; “Which one am I?” Seriously, this is not an issue you can brush aside or ignore; as a believer, sooner or later you will have to confront it.  God will not trust you with leadership unless you have first been a disciple.

In Matthew 4:19 Jesus told his disciples ‘Follow Me and I will make you fishers of men’ in his instruction “Follow Me” is the essence of discipleship. “I will make you fishers of men” – that’s leadership. In Mark 3:13-16 we see that Jesus ‘went up on the mountain and called to Him those He Himself wanted. And they came to Him. Then He appointed twelve that they might be with Him and might send them out to preach and to have power to heal sicknesses and to cast out demons’ Note that He called them to be with Him before He sent them out to be leaders.
A poor disciple will make a poor leader and a great disciple will make a great leader. Sadly, we live in a day and age where people want to be leaders without first being disciples. So the big question today is; are you a disciple or are you just one of the multitudes? How can you tell which one you are? Simply ask yourself two questions: “Have I submitted myself to systematic teaching?” “Does my life remind people of my Master, Jesus?” In Acts 4:13, when Peter and John were summoned before the Sanhedrin, they could tell straight away that they had been with Jesus. So, let me give you a few pointers: First, if people can’t tell that you have been with Jesus, chances are you are not a disciple. Second, if you only come to church on Sundays, chances are you are not a disciple. Third, if you have not submitted yourself to any form of systematic biblical instruction, chances are you are not a disciple.

In Luke 6: 40 Jesus said ‘A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone who is perfectly trained will be like his teacher.’ This makes clear that you cannot separate discipleship from training. The purpose of discipleship is maturity; the process of discipleship is teaching. Here at New Wine, there are different levels of discipleship training. First, there’s New Life Programme, which is a three week course for people who have just received Christ. Then there’s Membership Programme, which is a five week course for people who want to know more about church life and who want to formally become members. Then there’s Believer’s College – a ten week course for those who wish to take their relationship with God to the next level. These are all fantastic programmes that you can take advantage of, if you’re serious about discipleship.
Evangelism is also an integral part of the great commission. In Mark 16: 15 Jesus said ‘Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature’. ‘Go’ is an action word – it means “you take the initiative”. ‘Go’ means a change of location – it means “don’t wait for people to come; you go and find them”.
Now, here’s the big argument for evangelism: ‘If we don’t go, how will they know?’ Romans 10:14 poses the fundamental question ‘ But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them’?  In each of our lives, there are people who are doomed to an eternity without God, unless we open our mouths and tell them about Jesus.
One of the biggest ways the body of Christ has been crippled is that we have been sold this lie that Ministry is the exclusive reserve of a few. Remember, the church is a body and just like the physical body, it functions when every part ministers to every other part. You are healthy and fit today because every part of your body is actively engaged in ministering to every other part. If only a few parts of your body were working, you would not be able to operate at your maximum potential. In Ephesians 4: 16 Paul explains ‘He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.’ The body is at its best when every part does its share and every joint supplies. In the book of Acts where we are told that believers shared and pooled resources, although this relates primarily to financial resources it is equally applicable to giftings, abilities and non-financial resources. Everyone contributed towards meeting the needs of everybody else. That’s how a healthy church is supposed to function. Now, here’s the interesting part – everybody has needs. And just as God has called someone else to meet your needs, He has called you to meet someone else’s needs. It is amazing what a local church can do if we all just simply realised that we are all ministers.

You are a minister – you are created for ministry, saved for ministry, called into ministry, gifted for ministry, authorised for ministry, commissioned for ministry and needed for ministry! But, you may ask, if we are all called to minister, what are the leaders supposed to be doing? Well, this is how it works: the members minister, the leaders administer.  Each of us has our own share in ministry and if every part does its share, there will be no place for competition. The hand is a hand because it is good at doing hand things.  The eye is the eye because it is gifted at seeing.  As a body, we’re called to minister to one another. The phrase ‘one another’ appears in the bible 58 times: Love one another; Care for one another; Bear one another’s burden; Greet one another; Encourage one another; Pray for one another ; Share with one another to name but a few. So here’s another important question you must ask yourself; “Am I doing my share? Am I involved in the ‘one another’ dynamic of church life?”

So there we have it – our seven lifestyle statements: Baptism, Communion, Worship, Fellowship, Evangelism and Ministry. This is how we live!

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT OUR CHURCH

 Explaining the Story, Statements, Structure and Strategy Of New Wine Church 

“THIS IS WHERE WE STAND”

By Pastor Tayo Adeyemi
New Wine Church, London

Sunday 14 August 2011

Foundation Scriptures: Matthew 16:18 & Habbakuk2: 2-3

You will recall that last week, we challenged ourselves about the importance of engaging dynamically with the prophetic word that God is sending to us in this season and learned that we must let these prophetic concepts dominate our thinking and our prayers. We are therefore continuing on our journey of understanding of the season that we have entered into, and from the standpoint that we can only really understand where we are going when we understand where we have been and indeed, where we currently are, we have been examining the story, statements structure and strategy of New Wine Church.
We looked at four key aspects of our identity as a church; the four things that unite us and make us unique: Our story (where we came from); our statements, (why we exist);  our structure, (what we look like) and our strategy, (how we function).
We have looked at the first aspect of our statements, our Mission Statement and learned that there are four dimensions of our vision as a church. The individual aspect of our vision: discover, develop and deploy, the local aspect, encapsulated in salt and light, the national aspect encapsulated in ‘for such a time as this’ and the  global aspect of our vision, encapsulated in the phrase ‘round the clock; round the world’.
Now today, we’re going to look at the other two aspects of our statements: our Statement of Faith and our Lifestyle Statement. Let’s start with our Statement of Faith, which speaks of what we believe. This is important as what we believe determines how we behave and therefore, our Statement of Faith informs our life.
1 Peter 3:15 tells us ‘if anybody asks why you believe as you do, be ready to tell him’. It is important for us to know not only what we believe, but also why we believe and therefore this is our Statement of Faith:
We believe  ...In one true God, the Creator of heaven and earth, the sustainer of all things, eternally existent in three Persons: God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit.
...In the deity of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. We believe that He was supernaturally conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the virgin Mary, lived a perfect, sinless life and died on the cross for the sins of mankind. He arose from the dead, appeared to many in His glorified body, ascended to heaven and will return to earth in power and glory. 
...In the Holy Spirit who convicts the world of sin, of righteousness and of judgement, who brings about the new birth and dwells within believers, enabling them to grow in sanctification. We believe that the Holy Spirit is a real Person; and that all believers in Christ can enjoy His  fellowship, comfort, leadership, direction and empowerment in their daily lives.
...In the baptism of the Holy Spirit for all believers with the evidence of speaking in tongues and the operation of the gifts of the Holy Spirit in the assembly of believers.
...In the scriptures as the inspired and infallible word of God, given for the purpose of directing people to salvation.  They are authoritative, without error and the only basis of our faith and fellowship.
...In the salvation of mankind through the redeeming work of Jesus Christ and the regenerative work of the Holy Spirit.
..Man was created in the image and likeness of God; but fell from this state of glory through the original sin of Adam and Eve, thereby becoming sinful and depraved in nature.
..By turning from sin to repentance and believing in Christ and in His death and resurrection, people are born again into eternal life.
..In the church as the body of Christ whose task it is to take the gospel to all people in all nations and make disciples of them. The church consists of all persons who have become new creations through their faith in Jesus Christ, who is the Head of the church. In the ordinances of the church which are the Lord’s Supper and baptism by total immersion in water. 
...In divine healing as has been provided for by the death of Jesus Christ on the cross of Calvary.  All believers can claim the promise of divine healing by personal faith in Jesus Christ.
...In the consummation of all things, initiated by the imminent physical return of Jesus Christ to receive His church, the resurrection of both the saved and the lost; the one to eternal life and the other to eternal damnation, and the establishment of God’s Kingdom forever.
On the understanding that what we believe determines how we behave, let’s look at our Lifestyle Statements. These are a product of our Mission Statement and our Statement of Faith and describe how we live out our Christian faith.  Our Lifestyle Statements are: Baptism, Communion, Worship, Fellowship, Discipleship, Evangelism and Ministry. We will look at the first three in detail today, and then we will examine the other four next week.
Baptism: This is one of the church ordinances, a practice ordained by Christ. In
Matthew 28:18-19 Jesus instructed us to make disciples of all nations ‘baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit’.  Similarly in Mark 16: 15-15-16 He said ‘He who believes and is baptized will be saved’. It involves the immersion of a believer in water as an outward symbol of his faith. In the same way that a married person wears a wedding ring , they are not married because they wear a ring, rather, they wear a ring because they are married. Likewise, you are not saved because you got baptised; rather, you got baptised because you are saved. Remember what Jesus said in Mark 16:16 – “He who believes and is baptised”. You believe first, then you get baptised; it is the symbolic outward manifestation of the inward experience of salvation.
All through scripture, baptism is always very closely linked with salvation and is an integral part of the great commission. There are many examples in scripture of people getting baptised; and in every case, it was by immersion. In Matthew chapter 3, Jesus Himself was baptised by John the Baptist, in Acts 8, Philip baptised the Ethiopian eunuch and in Acts 10, the entire household of Cornelius was baptised.
As believers, baptism represents our identification with Jesus Christ in His death, burial and resurrection. When we get saved, we acknowledge that Jesus was crucified for us, that He died; He was buried and was resurrected for us. In baptism, we acknowledge that we were crucified with Him, that we died, were buried and were resurrected with Him. Romans 6:4(MSG) states ‘When we are lowered into the water, it is like the burial of Jesus; when we are raised up out of the water, it is like the resurrection of Jesus.’ I recommend that you study Romans 6 3-11for a detailed explanation of the significance of baptism.
Communion: The second ordinance of the church, ordained by Jesus is communion. The term derives from the Greek word ‘koinonia’ which means fellowship or association, signifying partnership, agreement and a state of giving and receiving. The origins of Communion can be found in the book of Exodus, when God commanded the children of Israel to eat the Passover, to commemorate their deliverance from Egypt. In the New Testament, Jesus ate the Passover with His disciples on the eve of His crucifixion, breaking bread and sharing wine with them, instructing them to continue to do this in remembrance of Him. The broken bread represents the body of Jesus, which was broken for us; the wine represents the blood of Jesus, which was shed for us (See 1 Corinthians 11: 23-26).Under the Old Covenant, they celebrated an event; but today, under the New Covenant, we celebrate a Person.
Each time we take communion there are a number of important things that should be undertaken: Firstly,  it is an opportunity for self-examination as 1 Corinthians 29-29 encourages us to do. Unfortunately, this scripture is often misinterpreted to mean; “If you are unworthy, don’t dare participate!” whereas in fact, it says examine yourself; then eat the bread and drink the cup. It means we should quickly examine ourselves and if we need to repent of anything, we should do so quickly and then partake in communion. Secondly, when we partake of communion, it is important that faith is released, otherwise, it’s just a mere religious ritual and it will be of no benefit. Consider what the broken body and the shed blood of Jesus means and then believe God for something specific – a healing, deliverance, a miracle or a breakthrough, connect it to something you want God to do. I have seen people healed of incurable diseases and delivered from demonic oppression while taking communion. Thirdly, when you partake of communion, reflect on its significance and undertake a threefold look – a backward look, an upward look and a forward look. Look back in appreciation as you reflect what Jesus did when He died on the cross (1 Corinthians 11: 26), look up in adoration and reflect on what Jesus is doing now for you - He is making intercession for you at the right hand of the Father (Romans 8:34), and look forward in anticipation and reflect when you will be with Jesus and partake of communion in heaven (Matthew 26: 29).
Worship:  As children of God, worship is our number one priority.  We were not created to have careers or big houses or exciting hobbies or nice families, we were created to worship God. In fact, the bible makes it clear that God is looking for true worshippers (John 4: 23-24) and He will effortlessly bypass 100 people playing church for a true worshipper.  There are different styles of worship.  It’s not wrong to worship differently from other believers as long as it is in spirit and in truth.
At New Wine Church, our worship is: celebrative, reflective/contemplative and expressive. Celebrative worship speaks of the gladness, exuberance and joy that accompany our worship. As children of God, regardless of our circumstances, we always, always have something to celebrate, something to be glad about. Psalm 100 instructs us ‘Serve the Lord with gladness and come before His presence with singing , enter into His gates with thanksgiving and into His courts with praise. Be thankful to Him, and bless His name’.
Reflective worship speaks of the contemplation that accompanies our worship as we meditate and reflect on who God is, what He means to us and what He has done for us. There is an aspect of worship where we are quiet before God and make ourselves available to Him like a waiter would wait on a guest at a restaurant.
Expressive worship speaks of the triumphant and demonstrative aspect of our worship, whether it’s in the clapping of hands, or in shouting or in confession. Psalm 47 instructs us ‘Oh, clap your hands, all you peoples! Shout to God with the voice of triumph!’ and in Psalm 66: 1-2 ‘Make a joyful shout to God, all the earth!  Sing out the honour of His name; Make His praise glorious.’
Psalms 95:1-2 says ‘Oh come, let us sing to the Lord! Let us shout joyfully to the Rock of our salvation.  Let us come before His presence with thanksgiving; Let us shout joyfully to Him with psalms.’ If you study those scriptures closely, you will see that there is a strong correlation between expressive praise and victory over the enemy. As the account of Jehoshaphat in 2 Chronicles 20 demonstrates, our worship is an act of warfare, confounding the forces of darkness. I challenge you therefore to determine to be nothing less than that which God is seeking, a true worshipper.

RULE IN THE MIDST OF YOUR ENEMIES

Praise Awaits You in Zion!

Pastor Tayo Adeyemi

                                                                  Sunday 05 June 2011

Foundation Scriptures: Psalm 65: 1; Psalm 110-1-2

Our service today, the fifth day of Deeper and Higher 2011, our month of prayer and fasting, has been dedicated as a Praise Party and so I am going to be talking to you briefly about praise. The background to this is that I was recalling the great promises that God made during Deeper & Higher 2010, in particular His promise that there would be an 18 month window of opportunity within which He would move dramatically in our lives. In prayer, I reminded God that 11 months had passed and that there were only 7 months of this season left. God responded by asking me whether or not I trusted Him to do what He had said He would do, to which I replied “Absolutely, Lord!” “In which case”, God said “why don’t you praise me as if I’ve already done it?!”  And thus our Praise Party was birthed!

God has given us a clear mandate to enter into this month with praise – to praise Him for answered prayer as if we already had the answers to our prayers. But before we do that, I think it is important to shed a bit of light on our theme for this month.  Psalm 110:1-2 says “The Lord said to my Lord, sit at My right hand, till I make Your enemies Your footstool. The Lord shall send the rod of Your strength out of Zion. Rule in the midst of Your enemies!”  This is a Messianic Psalm – meaning that it refers primarily to our Lord Jesus Christ. If you’re wondering how I knew that, just go and read Matthew 22:43-45.

Now, anything that God gave to Jesus is also yours to claim. Why?  - Because we are heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ. Ephesians 2: 4-6 says that “we sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus” and so where it says ‘The Lord said to my Lord’, you can change it to read ‘The Lord said to me!’ So, what is God saying to you in this season? Let me show you very quickly, five things that belong to you in this passage:

YOUR POSTURE: Sit. Not stand, not pace up and down, not cower in fear; but sit. Sitting is a posture of resting. It’s a posture that says ‘Everything is under control’. But also, sitting is a posture of ruling. Kings rule from a seat. Lawgivers decree from a seat. Judges decide from a seat. When you sit with Christ, you rest in Him, you rule with Him and you reign with Him.

YOUR POSITION: Sit at My right hand. The right hand is the place of dignity and honour; the right hand is the place of defence and protection. Psalms 121:5 says ‘The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade at your right hand.’ Also, the right hand is the place of blessing and favour. Every blessing that comes from God to you will pass through His right hand. And finally, the right hand is the place of dominion and power. All through scripture, the right hand of God always speaks of His power, His might and His dominion. When you sit at God’s right hand, you rest, you reign and you rule with Him in a place of dignity and honour; defence and protection; blessing and favour; and dominion and power.

YOUR PROMISE: Sit at My right hand till I make your enemies your footstool. Conjure up an image of two pieces of furniture – a seat and a footstool. The seat is the resting place, the reigning place; and the footstool is the subduing place. Now, notice you don’t have to do anything; God is saying “I will make your enemies your footstool. Your job is to make your way to my right hand and sit down there. I will do the rest. I will gather all your enemies, seen and unseen, and I will make them your footstool.”

Poverty? Your footstool! Sickness?  Your footstool! Death? Your footstool! Cancer? Your footstool. Recession? Your footstool! Tragedy? Your footstool! Whatever your enemies may be called, they are your footstool. You know, there is sitting; and there is sitting and putting your feet on a footstool. It means you are completely relaxed. No stress, no fuss, no struggle. The battle has been decided, and the victory has been won!

YOUR POWER: Rule in the midst of your enemies. You know, you need to stop praying to God to kill your enemies because if He does so you’ll have no footstool and have no-one to bow at your feet!  Notice that in Psalm 23: 5 we are told ‘You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.’

In the days that kings went to war, they deliberately kept some of their enemies alive and brought them back as trophies of war. Sometimes, the humiliation of your enemies is worse than their destruction. “Rule in the midst of your enemies” means establish your dominion over them, subdue them, triumph over them, enforce your authority over them.

But what would give you the audacity to rule when you are surrounded by enemies? Well, that brings me to the real focus of my message today.

YOUR PALACE: The Lord shall send the rod of Your strength out of Zion. The rod of your strength speaks of the sceptre of your rulership. A sceptre is a ceremonial staff held by a king as a symbol of authority. It is an instrument of power with which kings rule. All through scripture, the rod or the sceptre always spoke of royal authority, power and dominion. God put a rod in the hand of Moses, and for the rest of his ministry, he did awesome things with that rod. It was only when king Ahasuerus held out his golden sceptre to Esther that she was permitted to come into his presence.

Long before kings wore crowns, they held sceptres as the symbol of their power and dominion. Not everyone is allowed to carry a sceptre. To hold a sceptre in your hand, you must either be a king or have the delegated authority to represent a king.  And the king’s sceptre is recognised throughout the entire realm of his dominion.  When the sceptre of the king arrives in a part of his realm, the people must bow and pay attention as if the king himself were there. A king could be sitting in his palace, and his sceptre will command the same authority as his  physical presence, thousands of miles away, to the farthest reaches of his domain. Now, this scripture says the Lord will send the rod of your strength or the sceptre of your rulership from Zion. So the rod of your strength will proceed from where? From Zion.

Notice, we are not told the limit of how far it will reach. God does not place any boundaries on how far your strength will go. But He tells us categorically where it will start from – Zion (see Psalms 110:2).  

Now, if Zion is where my strength comes from, I need to find out all I can about Zion.  Zion is an old fashioned word that you hardly hear in church nowadays; but let me tell you a little bit about Zion: The word ‘Zion’ does not appear in the bible until the time of David when he took it at a stronghold (see 2 Samuel 5:7). Until this time, it was the headquarters of the Jebusites but when David captured it, he made it the centre of worship in Israel. He built a tabernacle and commissioned twenty-four hour worship there.

Until this time, the only place of worship that the children of Israel knew was the tabernacle of Moses, which was positioned on Mount Gibeah. But from the time that the Philistines captured the Ark of Covenant, that tabernacle began to fall to ruins. So, when David brought back the Ark, he placed it on Mount Zion and established a new order of worship in Israel. Here, there was no outer court, no holy place, and no holy of holies. There was no circumstance or ceremony, none of the fancy fabric of Moses’ tabernacle; just a box under a plain tent. The signature feature of Zion was worship – and oh, did they worship there! For some peculiar reason, God’s heart was drawn towards Zion; He always spoke favourably about it - you could almost hear the fondness and the longing in His voice. And also, you find that He connected many blessings to Zion. It was almost as if God was saying, ‘You will find My hand in many places, but My heart will always be in Zion’ God was so fond of Zion, that it became known as the dwelling place of God and I believe the reason for this is that He knew that praise was always waiting for Him in Zion.

Let’s look quickly at some of the blessings associated with Zion: (i)Zion is the dwelling place of God (Psalm 132: 13-15); (ii) Zion is the place of salvation (Isaiah 46: 13) (iii) Zion is the place of answered prayer, help and strength (Psalm 20: 1-2) (iv) Zion is the place of deliverance, holiness and restoration (Obadiah 17) (v) Zion is the place of strength (Psalm 84: 3) (vi) Zion is the place of the commanded blessing (Psalm 128: 5 & Psalm 133:3) (vii) Zion is the place of revelation (Isaiah 2: 3)

I believe that David tapped into a secret that you and I can benefit from today. If you want to get God’s attention, give Him praise. If you want to experience the presence and power of God in your life, give Him praise. If you want answers to your prayers, give God praise. If you need deliverance, give God praise. If you have come to the end of your tether and you don’t know where else to turn, give God praise. If you are weak and you need strength, give God praise. If you are desperate and you need help, give God praise. If you want to walk in the covenant blessings of God, give Him praise. If you want to rule in the midst of your enemies, give God praise. If you want to draw strength out of Zion, bring praise into Zion. The only way to enter His gates is with thanksgiving in your heart, the only way to come into His courts is with praise.

When everything else fails, and you don’t know what else to do, just open your mouth and start to praise God. If there is a Jericho wall that stands between you and your promise, start to praise God – and watch that wall come down. When you are stuck between a rock and a hard place, open your mouth and praise God. When you have prayed and prayed and prayed, and you can’t pray anymore, just start to praise God. If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, just start to praise God.

There is something about the praise of a believer that God can’t resist. God will leap over a thousand people who are playing church; and He will come to the aid of one worshipper who truly knows how to praise Him. A Syro-Phoenician woman, who was a stranger to the covenant of Israel, worshipped her way to her daughter’s deliverance. The madman of Gadara was possessed by a legion of demons; and all those demons could not keep him from worshipping. And the moment he started to worship, that was it – they had to be evicted. Jehoshaphat said “We have no might against this great company, nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are on You.” Then they started to praise God. God came down and confounded their enemies. They turned against one another and wiped each other out. Paul and Silas worshipped their way out of a Philippian jail. You can worship your way out of any situation; and you can worship your way into any blessing.

David ruled in the midst of his enemies because he knew how to worship God. The trouble with most of us is we want to wait until we get our breakthrough before we praise God. But there is such a thing as pre-emptive praise - it is when you praise God in advance. And I have discovered that when praise breaks forth in your spirit, heaven opens and something breaks forth. In Genesis 7: 11 we see ‘all the fountains of the great deep were broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.’  And so I challenge you – break up your fountains of praise!  Empty your reserves of adoration! Pour out thanksgiving for what He has already done.

Tell the Lord ‘Praise is awaiting you O God in Zion’‘ and rule in the midst of your enemies! 

STRONG THROUGH THE STORMS

EQUIPPING YOUR FAMILY TO THRIVE THROUGH THE SEASONS OF LIFE

It's Time for Repairs

Pastor Tayo Adeyemi

                                                                  Sunday 29 May 2011

Foundation Scriptures: Matthew 7: 24 - 27

Over the past few weeks we have looked at the foundation, structure and security that keep a house strong through the storms. Last week we zeroed in specifically on extra-marital affairs and looked at eight factors that can make a marriage vulnerable: loneliness, boredom, insecurity, pressures, revenge, lust, emotional detachment and misplaced priorities.

Today I want to conclude this series by talking to you about what to do after an affair has happened. Actually, I want to deal with more than just repairs - I want to look at the issue of affairs from three perspectives: First, what to do if there is no apparent risk of an affair (PREVENTION).  Second, what to do if there is an apparent risk of an affair (CRISIS MANAGEMENT) and third, what to do if an affair has happened (DAMAGE REPAIR).

PREVENTION:  It is important to see an affair as a disease that afflicts a marriage, in the same way as sickness can afflict a person. A person who is strong and healthy has a better chance of fighting off disease; likewise a marriage. If the marriage is strong and healthy, it is less likely that an affair will occur. A healthy person has a better chance of surviving an illness. Likewise, if a marriage is healthy to start with it is more likely to survive an affair. So with that in mind, let’s look at five things you can do to prevent an affair:

Establish the Priorities: If you fail to make your spouse your number one priority you leave yourself wide open for temptation. Don’t be satisfied with a marriage that is just ‘okay’. Be determined that your marriage will be strong and vibrant and never be complacent. Don’t settle for anything less than excellence in your marriage.

Abolish the Risks: Every marriage is at risk of breaking down. Be acutely aware of your own personal weaknesses; and do everything you can to protect yourself against them. Also, remember that what was not a risk at one stage of marriage can become a risk at a later stage. There is no guarantee that a couple who have a great marriage after five years will still have a great marriage at twenty years. Things change, and so do people. As a marriage progresses, new weakness may develop and new risks may surface therefore identify the risk factors and do your best to minimise them.

Demolish the Lies: We are constantly surrounded by lies about marriage and about infidelity. On television and in movies marriages are portrayed as boring, dead-end relationships in which the sex is dull and passionless. In contrast, affairs are portrayed as exciting, stimulating and rejuvenating in which the sex is portrayed as steamy and passionate. You need to recognise this media propaganda for what it really is – a lie. Yes, there are some dull marriages, but there are many more that are exciting and fulfilling. Likewise, there are many terrible affairs where both parties feel trapped and guilt ridden.

Diminish the Weaknesses: Every chain is as strong as its weakest link. Likewise, every marriage is as strong as its weakest aspect. Any weakness in a marriage presents an opportunity for an affair to develop. An affair can develop in marriages that are generally in good condition, even in marriages that are considered strong. At least once a year, create time to locate the weak areas of your marriage and determine to do something about it. Let’s look at some symptoms of a weak marriage. Although most marriages will experience some of these symptoms from time to time, if a good number of them occur frequently, then you know something’s not right: (i) You don’t want to spend time with your spouse; (ii) You constantly have regrets about marrying them; (iii) You constantly think or use hard words about your spouse and say negative things about them; (iv) You are enduring rather than enjoying your marriage; (v) You can’t remember the last time you laughed together; (vi) You keep secrets from each other; (vii) The only physical contact you have is when you both want sex; (viii) you rarely give or receive compliments to each other.

Admonish Yourself:  Make yourself accountable by putting yourself in a position where you can be asked questions about what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. There are four levels of accountability: (i) accountability to yourself - continuously examine your actions and your motives (ii) accountability to your spouse - always tell each other the truth and refuse to keep secrets from each other; (iii) accountability to someone else  - another married person of the same sex who you will give the permission to ask you or challenge you about anything and to whom you will be absolutely honest; (iv) accountability to God - recognise that God sees you and sees through you. He sees everything you do in secret and knows your deepest motives.

If you can take these preventive measures, the risk of an affair will be greatly reduced in your marriage. But, what if the risks are already there and one of you is on the brink of having an affair? You must enter into CRISIS MANAGEMENT. I will look at this from two angles: First, if you are the one who is on the brink of an affair and second, if your spouse is the one on the brink of an affair. If you are the one who is about to have an affair, there are four things you need to consider:

Reflect on the Consequences: Life is about cause and effect. Every action has consequences. God has given you free will and will not take from you the power to make your own choices. But likewise, He will not protect you from the consequences of your choices.  The devil never discloses the consequences of what he is telling you to do and only shows the benefits and pleasures involved. I suggest therefore that you evaluate all the things you stand to gain by having an affair against all that you stand to lose. When you write the gains, ask yourself “Are all these gains guaranteed?”  Consider the impact on family and friends, the emotional costs, the financial costs, the damage to your reputation and then pause and honest ask yourself, “Is it really worth it?”

Resist the temptation: Adultery always begins in the head and ends up in the bed. If you can deal with it while it is still in the head, then you won’t have to deal with it in the bed. The best place to resist temptation is when it is knocking at the door of your mind. Cast down those imaginations and say “Get thee behind me Satan!”

Run from the Danger: Most temptations are geographical. It may be a pub or a friend’s house or a hotel or an office; one of the quickest ways to overcome temptation is to avoid that location. If you find yourself there, don’t overestimate your ability to resist, don’t underestimate the power of sin to overwhelm you; just run.

Remember the Vows: You made a solemn covenant agreement with another person and to break that promise is a very serious thing, especially if you made the promise before God. Promises are meant to be kept.

Now, what if you’re not the one who is on the brink of an affair, but you have reason to believe that your spouse is about to do so? I want to suggest four things:

Determine not to Make Things Worse - To start with, don’t panic or fly into a fit of rage. Granted, you are upset and you feel hard done by; and rightly so.  But be clear about this – your angry reaction is likely to only make things worse.

Discern the Situation: Try to understand exactly what you’re dealing with; this is half way towards solving it. Find out what is driving your spouse. Is there any part you might have played to contribute to the situation? Is there anything you can do to avert the situation? You may well be able to save your marriage by making a few adjustments on your part. However, refuse to assume 100% of the blame, even if your spouse blames you.

Discuss with Your Spouse: See if you can talk things through. This must genuinely be a two way communication rather than one person is pointing fingers or justifying themselves. If there is too much hurt or anger for a reasonable discussion then bring in a third party – a leader in church or a spiritually mature couple.

Deposit it at God’s Feet: Never underestimate the power of prayer in situations like this but be careful that you are not praying manipulative, witchcraft prayers. Your prayers should be for God touch your spouse’s heart and reveal the truth to them and for you to receive wisdom, direction, peace and patience.

We have looked at prevention and crisis management but what if an affair has already happened? This is when you have to do DAMAGE REPAIR.  An affair does not have to be the deathblow to a marriage. As devastating as an affair can be, it is not the end – there is still hope. So, no matter how hurt or angry you feel, don’t make any drastic decisions. Give yourself time and seek counsel. Of course, if the marriage was strong to start with, the chances of recovery and restoration are considerably higher.

Although some people will argue that Jesus said if your spouse commits adultery, you can divorce them Jesus did not say sexual immorality must automatically end in divorce. Also, when a woman who was caught in adultery was brought to Jesus in John 8, He forgave her and gave her a second chance.

When an affair has occurred, there are two key ingredients necessary for effective repair: Repentance and Forgiveness.

Repentance: For there to be any kind of repair following an affair, the person who cheated must be genuinely repentant. Now, repentance is not the same as regret or remorse. True repentance is more than that. Repentance consists of a change of mind, a change of heart and a change of behaviour. Like the story of the prodigal son, the offending spouse (or you might say prodigal spouse), turns from their wayward lifestyle, returns home, acknowledges the pain they have caused and asks for a chance to start all over again. They shut the door on the past and leave no room whatsoever to return to that life again.

Forgiveness: Perhaps the most difficult thing to forgive is when someone you love and trust betrays you with an adulterous affair. Yet, if you must heal and if the marriage must heal, you must forgive. Forgiveness is primarily a decision; not an emotion; it does not always happen in an instant; and it is not the same as forgetting. However, forgiveness must not be manipulative - you should not continue to hold their sin over their head like Damocles’ sword.

One final thing about damage repair: Remember that repair takes time, so be patient. There are at least three stages in the repair process: The anger stage, the acceptance stage and the restoration stage. In reality, you may still be dealing with repair after two or three years. The offended spouse will do irrational things or make unreasonable demands sometimes. Remember, they are hurting; and you have no right to tell anyone how to or how not to hurt. Be patient and be gentle with each other. Above all, remember that an affair is a serious blow to a marriage, so don’t try to fix it yourself. Call for help. Involve the leadership or people who are more mature than you.

In this series, we have talked about foundation, structure, security and repair - four key ingredients that will keep your house strong through the storms. Remember that storms come and storms go. That’s the reality of life – no storm lasts forever. So the big question is not “Will you go through a storm?” The big question is “Will you be standing when the storm is over?”

STRONG THROUGH THE STORMS

EQUIPPING YOUR FAMILY TO THRIVE THROUGH THE SEASONS OF LIFE

Is Your House Secure?

Pastor Tayo Adeyemi

                                                                  Sunday 22 May 2011

Foundation Scriptures: Matthew 7: 24 - 27

Today we are continuing with our Family Convention theme, Strong Through the Storms, designed to equip our families to thrive through the seasons of life. Last week we looked at different aspects of a good home structure and also our building materials and agreed that most families build with a combination of good quality materials (things that impact our spouses positively and strengthen our marriages) and cheap, inferior materials (things that impact our spouses negatively and weaken our marriages), and we challenged ourselves to reduce the cheap materials until they are completely eliminated.  Now so far, we have considered foundations and structures which help our homes to remain strong through the seasons. Today, I want us to turn our attention to another key ingredient that makes a house strong, the security system.

Every house needs a good security system and the more valuable your house and its contents, the more ready you are to invest in security, because there are people who have made it their assignment to break into your home and help themselves to what belongs to you. We call them thieves. Jesus spoke about thieves noting that they never come at an hour that you expect (Matthew 24: 43); they seldom come in through the front door  the preferred approach being indirect (John 10:1) and their intention is to cause devastation (John 10: 10).

Now, I want to talk to you about how to secure your marriage against one particular kind of thief that has wrecked many marriages: extra marital affairs. Now, before you switch off, thinking that this does not apply to you, or if you think infidelity is something that could never happen in your marriage, get real! Whether you are married or currently single, in today’s society, extra marital affairs pose a real threat to any marriage. No marriage is immune from the storms of life, including the storm of infidelity. You need to build your marriage with the storm of infidelity in mind. I’m not encouraging you to live in fear; I’m simply asking you to fortify your home and beef up your security. So today, I am going to put some keys in your hand that will help you protect your marriage from an affair.

But first let us try to understand exactly what an affair is. We all know what an affair is, don’t we? Or do we? So, let’s define an affair: An affair is an illicit intimate relationship between two people who are not married to each other. If you understand that marriage is more than just a physical or sexual union, then it puts things in perspective. Sexual union is just one aspect of marriage. The marriage union also includes emotional, psychological, social and spiritual bonds. Now with this perspective, you will understand that it is actually possible to have an affair without having sex with another person. There are two kinds of affairs: The adulterous affair and non-adulterous affair. This adulterous affair is one in which sexual activity has occurred. It is the more common and more obvious kind of affair. The non-adulterous affair is one in which the exclusivity of the marriage union has been breached; the emotional, psychological, social and spiritual bonds stipulated in your marriage have been broken because those bonds have now been formed with another person. The non-adulterous affair is more difficult to define and is less drastic in impact; but nonetheless, it is just as devastating to a marriage.

Now, here’s a very important truth about affairs: they do not just happen. Nobody just suddenly finds themselves in the middle of an affair. There are some pre-disposing factors.  Long before you go somewhere with your body, you have been there in your mind. In fact, I am firmly convinced that sexual immorality is usually the culmination of a long spiritual, mental and emotional journey, whether you are single or married.  So let us look at some of those factors that predispose a person to having an affair. I will start with the five ‘smaller’ ones and conclude with the three ‘big’ ones.

Loneliness: This is the feeling that you do not matter to anyone, feeling insignificant, isolated and alone and the feeling of lacking companionship and support.  The urge to overcome loneliness can drive a married person to have an affair; as it can drive a single person to get sexually involved before marriage. Loneliness can be both physical and psychological. Physical loneliness is the more obvious and more common type. Here, the level of physical contact in the marriage is inadequate.  In psychological loneliness, there is a physical presence, but an emotional absence. Loneliness can become a very powerful pressure for an affair. If you don’t deal with the root cause, it can become fertile soil for an affair to blossom.

Boredom:  This is a state of dullness or tiresome repetitive routine. This can be within the marriage itself or in other areas of life, especially work. An affair can offer a promising escape from the mindless routine of purposeless existence. The excitement and change of pace that it offers can be seen as an adventure or even a challenge.  But the truth is, like any other stimulant, there is a heavy price to pay.

Insecurity: Insecurity is a lack of confidence, assurance or self esteem. An insecure person can be tempted to have an affair just to prove that they are still attractive and desirable (in the case of women); or that they still have their ‘mojo’ (in the case of men).  People who have an affair because of their insecurity or mid life crisis simply want to prove a point, however the trouble is, by the time the point has been proven, the damage has also been done.

Pressures: Sometimes an affair provides the perfect escape and diversion from the pressures of life. The pressures may be within the marriage itself or in other aspects of life such as health problems, financial difficulties, failure in business, difficulties with conception or even when a baby is on the way or a new born baby - the list goes on. The pressures are legitimate, but the solution is not. If you’re dealing with pressure, turn to God for help.

Revenge: Some people have an affair to get back at their spouse for first cheating on them or for being too jealous, controlling or abusive. However, two wrongs do not make a right and also, remember that when you cheat on your spouse, you are also hurting yourself. You deserve better than that. Whatever the reason is, no reason is good enough for you to hurt yourself that way.

Now, let’s look at the following three big predisposing factors to adultery:

Lust:  Lust is defined as illicit or uncontrolled sexual desire; intense sexual desire for what is not legitimately yours. This is clearly distinct from sexual desire for your spouse. Lust starts from within, but it is stirred up and fed from without. If you can control your lust, even if you had to deal with any of the five predisposing factors I have mentioned, you will not have an affair. We are constantly surrounded by sexual images and innuendos all day long. Add to this the very easy access to sexually explicit material, and a person who is struggling with lust is ripe for the picking. If you have a problem with lust, you need to deal with it. Otherwise, it will destroy, not just your marriage, but other aspects of your life. How do you deal with lust? Very simple, stop feeding it.  When a person is struggling with lust, adultery is usually not their first line of action; that comes further down the line. Usually, they start by finding other ‘less harmful’ ways to feed the lust – pornography, flirting and fantasising.  But the problem with lust is that it is never satisfied. So, the more you feed it, the bigger it gets and the more it wants.

Now, let me deal with pornography for a moment. If you view pornography on a regular basis (and by regular, I mean even a few minutes per week), you are destroying your marriage. Regular users of pornography eventually regard their spouses as less attractive. And over time, they begin to prefer masturbation over sex as a means of sexual fulfilment.  They push their spouses to be more and more sexually ‘creative’ and or sexually appealing. Spouses of regular pornography users generally feel unimportant, ignored, humiliated and angry. And although people who use pornography usually have an arsenal of arguments to defend their position, allow me to make clear that not every guy does it, pornography is not normal, and it is a problem – there is no such thing as harmless pornography. Pornography is very addictive, and just like alcohol and drugs, you’re never a good judge of when you have lost control. 

If you have a pornography habit, you need to admit that you have a problem with lust, and you need help. Secondly, withdraw all the excuses and thereby, demolish the strongholds. Thirdly, go to God in prayer and ask Him to help you. Fourthly, talk to someone about it. The greatest power of pornography is secrecy. Once you expose it, you take away its power and break its hold over your life. Also, make yourself accountable. Involve others in the battle – don’t fight alone. 

Emotional Detachment: One of the most subtle and dangerous factors that predispose to an affair is emotional detachment. A couple begins to drift apart and gradually they feel less and less connected to each other. It can start with legitimate reasons, such as work, raising children and even church. But gradually, they discover they are actually living two separate lives. At first glance, an emotionally detached couple looks okay. They might be great parents together; observers assume that they have a very strong marriage. They don’t fight, they don’t disrespect each other; in fact they don’t particularly have negative feelings towards each other. And that is actually part of the problem. They can’t even be bothered to any feelings any more – positive or negative. They just don’t have the energy for it. They’re not miserably unhappy, but they’re not happy either. Sex is either non-existent or a very, very rare occurrence. Gradually, each of them begins to find the comfort, companionship and passion they used to enjoy from each other in other places. And that is the beginning of trouble. If you find that you are emotionally detached as a couple, you both need to work hard (and yes, it is hard work) on reconnecting. How do you do this? By focussing on four levels of connection: (i) talk (ii) touch (iii) time and (iv) thoughts. Whereas lust is predominantly a male issue, emotional detachment drives both men and women to have an affair.

Misplaced Priorities: When you get married, your spouse becomes your number one priority. After God, your spouse comes first. Nothing and no one is supposed to come before your spouse. Whenever your spouse comes second to anyone or anything else in your life, you have got the order very wrong and you open the door for one of you to become vulnerable to the temptation of an extramarital affair. If your spouse is number two, they can also easily become number three or four or five. If they are already less important than your siblings, they can as well become less important than your good looking, caring, work colleague. The tendency to cheat is intensified. In their mind, if they’re not your number one, they see no reason why you should remain their number one. The tendency to cheat is intensified.

What’s the message here? Make sure your spouse is your number one priority. Make sure you know it, make sure your spouse knows it and make sure everybody else knows it. How do you know who your number one priority is? Consider the following pointers: (i) Time: Who do you spend most of your free time with; or who do you want to spend most of your free time with?  (ii) Communication: Who do you communicate with the most – either face to face, phone, text or email? (iii) Information: Who do you share information with first?  (iv) Opinions: Whose opinion do you value the most?  (v) Decisions: Who influences your decisions the most?  (vi) Celebration: Who do you celebrate the most? (vii) Shared Experiences: With whom do you have the most shared experiences? Who do you wish went with you to that restaurant, to see that movie, on that exotic holiday? (If you’re a single person, you will find these questions useful in helping you clarify your feelings about a person you like or a person who likes you.)

You now have in your hands eight ways to make your house more secure and to fortify your house against the storms of life and the thief who comes to steal, kill and destroy. Whether you are married or single, this is information you can use to build a strong and secure house. Now go and use it.